Concept:
One of the men to protect a noble during the war. When he fell, the guards were split to help out smaller forces.
Before the noble's death, he was told to help his servant deliver his sword back home when things cool down.
Background/Description:
Brown hair with a rough shave with a moderate beard. Ugly gash from the nose to cheek from a sword strike. Brown eyes. born to a knight, he was trained from a young age to follow in his father’s stead.
After being properly trained, he worked for a noble to repay debt, liking the job he shall stay even after the noble’s death...
Priorities:
3-H. Freeman, Affluent Muscle
4-23, atr
2-24, skill
4-20, prof
2-4, trait
Gear:
(Man-At-Arms package)
Billhook, 2c/1p, V.Long (3-4), 2h, Broad, Hook, Q. Spike.
Arming Sword, 1c/1p, Medium (2), 1h.
Bonds:
-Štěpán, (2pt) "I pulled him out from a tricky spot, he had a dead horse laying on him. If I didn't show up he might have been dead; good kid might have opportunities for him."
-Dalibor, (2pt) "Taught the young lad when he came by with Lord Marquart's brother in law, only some basic motions of swordplay."
-Arnost, (1pt) "Seems like a nice fellow, had a couple of drinks and laughs with 'em. Bit of an odd man but nice enough."
(Faith was too big (in the description now), the scar description is in my, well... description. Swapped my shortsword for an arming sword, more fitting to the time. New contact. Removed a drive. Edited the noble's sword description. edited trait, added (past)/(present) to my traits that I get for free.)
Sir Jaska Częstowoj
Moderator: thirtythr33
- Vaident
- Wanderer
- Posts: 3
- Joined: 30 Sep 2021, 01:02
- Location: Portland, OR
Sir Jaska Częstowoj
Last edited by Vaident on 14 Oct 2021, 00:53, edited 1 time in total.
- thirtythr33
- Editorial Inquisition
- Posts: 1266
- Joined: 12 Aug 2015, 03:23
Re: Jaksa Częstowoj
Looking good so far. Just a few details need to be sorted out before we can get started.
How do you see the "Assist to my fullest extent" drive playing out? I'm a bit worried that it is too general and doesn't give enough direction. Maybe something more like "Always help someone in need"?
For your contact and Affiliation, could you fill these out a bit? Pick a single knight to be your main contact and give them a name, and a few sentences on Jaksa's relationship with them and optionally a physical description or portrait. Also fill in the name of the noble and family you served. You should have something like Affiliation (The Lanisters) and Contact (Captain Bron).
What is special about the sword he is tasked to take home? Does it have some special meaning to the family?
You need to be more specific with your old war wound. Is it a scar across the face? A busted up knee that makes him walk with a limp? A shoulder that aches when it gets cold?
I think you might be missing the 2 free traits that all characters get to start with. Everyone should get a 1d character trait for who you once were (something to do with your history or background) and 1d character trait for who you are now.
How do you see the "Assist to my fullest extent" drive playing out? I'm a bit worried that it is too general and doesn't give enough direction. Maybe something more like "Always help someone in need"?
For your contact and Affiliation, could you fill these out a bit? Pick a single knight to be your main contact and give them a name, and a few sentences on Jaksa's relationship with them and optionally a physical description or portrait. Also fill in the name of the noble and family you served. You should have something like Affiliation (The Lanisters) and Contact (Captain Bron).
What is special about the sword he is tasked to take home? Does it have some special meaning to the family?
You need to be more specific with your old war wound. Is it a scar across the face? A busted up knee that makes him walk with a limp? A shoulder that aches when it gets cold?
I think you might be missing the 2 free traits that all characters get to start with. Everyone should get a 1d character trait for who you once were (something to do with your history or background) and 1d character trait for who you are now.
"O happy dagger!
This is thy sheath; there rust, and let me die."
- Juliet Capulet
This is thy sheath; there rust, and let me die."
- Juliet Capulet